The Final Countdown
My paternity leave begins next Tuesday the 19th. Anything is possible, but my wife and I have had our scheduled delivery for the past few weeks and have known that this was needed for this delivery to be as safe as possible for both her and her mom. As a schedule person, I'd be lying if I said it didn't provide a certain sense of ease, even if the situation itself is a bit stressful. Knowing that my second leel baby is scheduled to arrive next week has made for a strange week (and it's only Tuesday as I write this). It's a bit trite - but what would you do if you knew you only had a week left to get things done before a lengthy time away from your community? It's not quite a 'Live Like You Were Dying' moment, but it's still compelling to consider.
Certain things have been on a perpetual hold because of the anticipated arrival of our second-born child. I've had to make tough decisions about what to pursue and what to avoid. I've prepared advance videos and newsletters. Most of the work is done - so what do I do now? I've got meetings and streams and the usual stuff. But I can't really start some new huge project. There are things to get done - so I'm not exactly twiddling my thumbs. But the decisions I'm making don't feel like they have a future to them - they are stagnant and frozen to right now.
I don't think I'm experiencing anything too different from the standard anticipation that we go through during seasons of waiting. I've yet to receive a cherubic visitor, so I don't quite know if this child quite lives up to the term - but it is a downright Advent-esque feeling. It's all-at-once a now-and-not-yet rollercoaster of emotions and decisions. At moments, the only thing I can do is nothing. At others, I can hardly catch my breath with all that must be done. Regardless of my busy or idle hands, this baby will be here soon and the time of leave will arrive along with her. I'm sad for this to be the last newsletter I write in real-time for a while, but I'm glad to have the gift of sharing this news with you. See you in May. Until then - enjoy the backlogged newsletters and know that God loves you. We love you. You matter.